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YOUTH ARE AWESOME

Youth Are Awesome, commonly referred to as YAA, is a blog written by youth for youth. YAA provides the youth of Calgary a place to amplify their voices and perspectives on what is happening around them. Youth Are Awesome is a program of Youth Central.

Any views or opinions expressed on this blog belong solely to the author and do not represent those of people or organizations that the blog may be associated with, unless explicitly stated. All content is for informational purposes only.

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Underrated Movies/TV Shows That Deserve Your Attention Now

Hilary Guo
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I’ve been watching movies and TV shows for a long time now. Long enough to identify which ones are garbage and which are not. But one thing that has bothered me the most, is that the ABSOLUTE BEST films and shows (in my opinion) are coincidentally the most unpopular ones. It’s such a shame that these titles don’t have the recognition they deserve! They are life-changing, heart-breaking and all-in-all inexplicably amazing in every aspect. It’s time to justify their lack of attention and make them known!

BONNIE & CLYDE (2013)

Let’s just take a moment to appreciate this movie poster. Clyde and Bonnie. Bonnie and Clyde. Unquestionably one of the most iconic couples in history. This two-part miniseries (or three-hour-long movie if you watch on Netflix) follows the lives of Bonnie Parker and Clyde Barrow, from their first meeting to their last. Car chases and shootouts, all taking place in the dirty 30’s just to make it even greater. Watching this has evoked all sorts of feelings. This entire miniseries had been an emotional roller coaster, taking me on a ride and showcasing the rise and fall of the infamous Bonnie & Clyde. This picture says it all. Two people, madly in love, committing crimes along the way. Does it really get any better than this? I think this has got to be the best Bonnie & Clyde film of all time. The way the actors portray the roles of the two, it’s like they’ve become the actual characters. At times I felt like I was watching lost tapes of the real Bonnie and Clyde in action! Trailer

X COMPANY (2017)

I say this at least twice on a daily basis, but EVERYBODY GO WATCH X COMPANY, A.K.A. THE BEST SHOW KNOWN TO MAN. It pains me greatly knowing that probably only me and 4 other people have watched this show. It’s actually the most incredible thing that exists on earth, I’m just saying. This show could easily beat any other show on the face of the planet. 5 allied spies in occupied Europe during WW2? Tell me that it’s not the greatest thing you’ve ever heard. I would defend this show to the death without hesitation. Espionage, secrecy, drama, romance, kicking some Nazi butt. What more could you ask for? The plot never has a dull moment and trust me, this is the kind of show you’d pull all nighters for. Trailer

HANDSOME DEVIL (2016)

Handsome Devil is the cutest LGBTQ movie I’ve ever seen. It’s set in an all-boys, rugby-obsessed boarding school. Ned (right) is the only boy at his school who despises rugby, and just his luck, Conor (left), a rugby star has been assigned as Ned’s new roommate. But there was something different about Conor, something he wasn’t ready to admit to himself, much less the rest of the world. It’s a beautiful story about coming out and the fight against homophobia. It’ll make you cry and laugh at the same time. I highly recommend you watch this underrated movie. Trailer

OUR WORLD WAR (2014)

LIFE. CHANGING. I initially watched this three-part British miniseries on an airplane, which was a horrible idea because I nearly flooded the plane with my tears. I think I’ve cried more in these three episodes than I have my whole life. Let this be a warning, you’re going to need at least one whole box of tissues if you plan on watching. This BBC WW1 drama is so underrated it makes me angry. No shade, but this deserves twice as many views than the trashy shows on Netflix’s home page. It tells three different stories of the first world war, as told by people who lived it. This miniseries is nothing short of astonishing. From the trenches to the fields, the battlefront to the home front, it shows the tragedy and reality that was the great war. Trailer

UNDER SANDET [LAND OF MINE] (2016)

This German movie left me in a pool of tears. No joke. Don’t let the fact that it’s a foreign movie scare you from watching. It’s based on the true story of how after the second world war, leftover German prisoners of war were forced to stay and defuse landmines. It’ll make you feel so many emotions, by the time you’re finished you won’t even know what hit you. Plot twists are literally everywhere, and nothing goes the way you think it’s going to. It’s such a spectacular movie and deserves all the attention in the world. Trailer

Let these titles be known!

source 1 source 2 source 3 source 4 source 5

featured

Long receipts are absurd… or are they?

Lucy Han
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The Question:

These days, I rarely get receipts shorter than a 30cm ruler for purchasing a bag of chips at just about any store. It’s totally absurd so I wanted to find out why do stores did this.

Before researching this shower thought, I wanted to list out a few of my own reasons for why receipts are, what seems like, longer than my research papers I write for school.

1. For people to collect and turn into a mummy costume for Halloween. (Or in the holiday spirit, turn into scarves and keep warm.)
2. To be used to make origami stars.
3. Turn into DIY birthday party streamers.

My list could probably go on (it actually did but I’ll spare you from my ridiculous answers), but you can tell that I was completely stumped with coming up with anything reasonable. It’s just that typically I don’t see people casually reading their receipts any time after their purchase, or any time at all for that matter. And so I googled “why are receipts so long?”

My top 3 were Search Results:

– Why Store Receipts from CVS, Kmart, Target Are So Long | Money

– CVS receipts are so long they’ve become a meme … – Business Insider

– Why CVS Receipts Are So Long – Business Insider

For anyone who may not know what CVS is, it’s essentially an American drugstore, similar to Shopper’s Drug Mart, Rexall, or London Drugs. After reading these first few articles, I found out that CVS is (now, was) notorious for printing long receipts. If you thought any of our Canadian receipts were incredibly long, well you’re in for a treat. The lengths of CVS receipts is almost forgivable because they’re so long, it’s funny. This, of course, blew up across the Internet. Another google search of images of CVS receipts showed that my guesses weren’t too far off from what other customers were doing with their really really long receipts.

Boiling down the Why:

Some sources say that the long receipts from CVS were intentional. Having their receipts blowup on social media could have been a clever tactic to make customers out of curious people. Was it a marketing strategy? It makes sense because Starbucks is known for something similar. Their notorious reputation for misspelling names is purposely meant to get customers to share pictures of their drinks on social media.

Or…the strategy involves sending customers away with question marks bobbing above their heads and hoping that the customers will share their experience.

Fun fact! Starbucks recently spelled my name as “Lusie”. (I’d put a picture but I drank my mint mocha before I remembered a picture would be cool)

So long, long receipt!

As of May 2016, CVS implemented a digital receipt system where “Customers [could] have the opportunity to opt-out of receiving paper receipts for all in-store purchases when completing their transactions in the front of the store. Once the one-time process is completed, customers will receive receipts digitally, along with their coupons and rewards, each time they shop at CVS Pharmacy.” [x]

Just like VCRs, will we witness the elimination of receipts in the near future? While they still exist, lets celebrate the memories that receipts have brought to humanity up until this point.

I hope you enjoyed my scoop on long receipts and learned something new! Now, ttfn while I go make my next Halloween costume.

Images /1/2/3/4/

Dream-Pop Duo “Flower Crown” On Their Name, Debut Album “GLOW” and Influences

Emily Donville
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Coachella has inspired a lot. Whether its musicians at the beginning of their careers or questionable fashion trends, the size and scope of the festival has continually influenced music lovers all over the world, year after year. This includes Richie Colosimo and Aaron Mook. Together, they make up Pittsburgh, Pa’s “Flower Crown“. The duo have been busy making music since 2016, and just released their debut album “GLOW” back in October. I reached out to them a few weeks ago to chat about how they met, the music scene in Pittsburgh, the making of “GLOW” and what 2018 has in store for them. I knew I was in store for a good time when they sent me promo photos of them eating wings, and signed off with “hope all is gravy on your end”, so if you’re not yet convinced of their genius, keep reading to learn about Richie and Aaron and the magic they make.

 YAA: How did you guys meet? When did you guys form the band?

Richie: Aaron and I met at a Halloween show (I was Bob from Bob’s Burgers – crucial info) in Erie, Pa in the fall of 2015. In early 2016, Aaron came on a few tours with another band I’m in and we started kicking around the idea of starting a side project. We eventually started tracking demos in the summer/fall of 2016.

YAA: Where did the name “Flower Crown” come from?

Aaron: In college, my roommate and I threw an annual Coachella party where we’d put a live stream up on the TV. Either Richie or I made a joke about how many flower crowns there were in one of the crowds, and at that point we already had a few demos and knew the sound we were going for, so we thought the name would be fitting. We liked how tongue-in-cheek it was.

YAA: What’s the music scene in Pittsburgh like?

Richie: While I’m fairly new to Pittsburgh, I got a glimpse into the DIY scene while passing through with my other band Frame and Mantle in 2015-16. Since the time I’ve been here, I’ve seen so many seriously good artists coming up and some very hardworking promoters, volunteers, and labels that are making the scene here really, really good. Through it’s ups and downs, the Pittsburgh music scene has always been strong and I think it’s getting much stronger as of late.

YAA: How would you describe your music to somebody who’s never heard it before?

Aaron: I try to explain genres like “shoegaze” and “dream-pop” to my family members and coworkers all the time. Those are the genre tags we usually fall under, but for people who aren’t familiar, I’d probably just describe it as dreamy pop music. We write pop songs, but we try to turn them into something special with the textures and tones we use.

YAA: In terms of all your songs, what’s your favorite lyric and why?

Richie: Aaron and I are pretty inexperienced with writing lyrics, so I don’t know if we have anything lyrically that we’re confident enough to say is our best. However, the entire song “Lady of the Lake” is about lying in a hammock, so between the song and the lyrics, it puts me immediately back in a hammock on Presque Isle. Out of all the places the album takes me, that might be my favorite.

YAA: Your debut album “GLOW” was released back in October. Now that it’s out, how do you feel?

Aaron: Honestly, GLOW is a little bit darker than it leads on, or at least some of the circumstances around it were, so it feels good to have some of those songs off our chests. Production wound up being a little rushed — “Pls” was the last song we did vocals on and we literally had minutes left to finish it — and we liked the record, but we didn’t really know if other people would, especially after sitting on it for a few months while it was being mixed and mastered. It’s just a lot different than our EP, simultaneously a lot poppier and a lot weirder. So the positive response we’ve seen surrounding the album has been surprising and overwhelming, to say the least. I keep saying that if people like this record, we can make sure that they love the next one.

YAA: What artists had the most influence in terms of your sound on “GLOW”?

Richie: During the writing process, I was listening to the new DIIV record that had came out in ’16, plus Real Estate and Beach Fossils’ records from ’17, even some atmospheric black metal as sound influences. It’s easy to write something that gets lost in those bands respective genres so I didn’t want to stick to any certain formula. I just know the direction I wanted to head and I wanted to make something fresh that I would enjoy listening to.

YAA: How long did the album take to finish and where did you guys record it?

Richie: I started tracking demos in the fall of 2016 and by early 2017, we had enough to start recording a full-length album. We did a bulk of the recording at my “home studio” in Pittsburgh, but actually finished and mixed the album at Aaron’s house in Warren, Pa.

YAA: Did you guys run into any roadblocks during the production of the LP? If so, what were they and how did you overcome them?

Aaron: I think the biggest issues we experienced during production were simply time-related. I spent a week in Pittsburgh working on the demos with Richie, but we weren’t in great places in our personal lives at the time, so we didn’t get much accomplished aside from writing “Bloodshade.” We scrapped a lot of the vocal ideas from those sessions and waited until we were in a better place to record, which was the right decision. Richie is also more of a perfectionist when it comes to recording, which is great considering I’m kind of the opposite. I remember doing vocal takes for “Bloodshade” over and over and having to step away and get some air so I could convince myself I was a capable vocalist. Recording can be frustrating, but patience and understanding is key.

YAA: Is there anything people should know about the new album or even your music in general?

Aaron: GLOW is a cool record and we’re very proud of it. But the next one’s going to be even better.

YAA: If you could support any artist/band on tour, who would it be and where would you tour?

Aaron: That’s a great question. I think we’d fit great on a bill with Beach Fossils, especially if we branch out a little more with this next album. As far as where we’d tour, this probably isn’t a typical answer, but I’d want to do the festival circuit and watch our name come full circle.

Richie: I think it would be fun to tour with Wavves. We’d probably be booed off stage, but I feel like they would be fun to party with.

YAA: If you could only listen to one song for the rest of your life, what song would it be and why?

 Aaron: “Dramamine” by Modest Mouse immediately comes to mind. It’s probably my favorite song by my favorite band, maybe my favorite song period, and that repetitive, plodding guitar part would be fitting for some kind of Groundhog Day scenario.
 
Richie: “Dopesmoker” by Sleep. Sometimes a riff is so good you just want to hear it for the rest of your life. 

YAA: What’s next for you guys?

Richie: I recorded and released three records in 2017 and I have three LPs to record in 2018, so hopefully sleep at some point.

YAA: Any parting words of wisdom?

Aaron: This wisdom is recently acquired and untested, but for me, 2018 is about being myself and accomplishing as much as I can while I’m young. I recently had the epiphany that you’ll never get anywhere if you don’t start somewhere, so make a list of the things you want to achieve and the steps you need to take to get there. For me, it’s a podcast, a film script, and LP2.
Richie: Keep doing what you’re passionate about no matter how much time you can allocate to it and surround yourself with people who will support you along the way. 

Huge thanks to Richie and Aaron for talking to me! Don’t forget to follow them on social media and definitely give them a listen to see what you’re missing out on!

Bandcamp: https://flowercrownmusic.bandcamp.com/
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/flowercrownmusic/
Twitter: https://twitter.com/flwrcrwnmusic

(All photos received were provided by the artist or retrieved from the artist’s Facebook. NOT our own)

Not Good Enough

Madina Shaykhutdinova
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They are never good enough.

They’re okay, but never enough to stand out.

They’re just sort of there. Filler.

Even though they work hard

Even though they try their best.

But what does it matter when everybody

Is doing the best they can?

Then they are all the same.

A homogeneous sea of consistency.

Going beyond the requirements

But unable to surpass

The achievements of others.

Those in charge still adore them

Because they have mastered how to

Exceed the obligations.

But when they’re all overachievers

They are all the same.

Toeing the line between being

Totally complaisant

And being

Creative

Unsure which will lead to a better result.

Is it better to follow the tried-and-true path to success

Or is it better to be innovative?

Whatever they choose

They continue to work hard.

 

Sometimes it doesn’t even matter

Because everyone else is working just as hard.

Some of them give up

And sink

Down

Into what they believe

Are the depths of mediocrity.

Then, they either continue

Down

The downward

Spiral

Or they learn to let go.

To let go from the constant pressures,

The ever-present expectations

For perfection.

Because some people

Endeavor to completely meet

Somebody else’s expectations.

Some people

Dare to be controversial

And ingenious.

Good for them.

But not all of them can stand out.

Sometimes,

It’s okay to just

blend in.

But even then, they still find themselves

Wishing they were good enough.

 

Image source: 1

Calgary Women’s March 2018

Asha Nenshi Nathoo
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The diverse group of people came out to advocate for a range of issues including women’s rights, migration reform, LGBTQ rights, racial justice, freedom of religion and more.

I was incredibly honoured to be one of the speakers at the 2018 Calgary Women’s March performing an original slam poem. I have to admit that the days leading up the March were filled with nervousness. I had attended the March the previous year, incredibly inspired to see so many come together in an effort to bring about change. Yet, I knew again there would be thousands of attendees out there listening. I had participated in debate and public speaking competitions numerous times before, but by no doubt had ever addressed a crowd this large. What if I made a mistake? What if they didn’t like my poetry? On the morning of the event, as I stood in the brisk cold for my sound check, unsure of how far from the mic I should be or how loud I should speak, I still wasn’t too sure what I was doing.

Courtesy of Women’s March Canada – Calgary FB page

Over the next the couple hours as I met fellow speakers, volunteers and marchers, I was overwhelmed with support. It was evident that the vast majority of people where there to stand in solidarity with their neighbours and inspire action. Special shout out to my fellow two youth speakers – Jane (age 14) an LGBTQ activist, and Leanne (age 11) an Indigenous poet whom I got to know for their true sincerity and braveness.

When the time came to preform, the reason some of my anxiety evaporated and I was able to enjoy myself was because I felt the audience was engaged. As a speaker, the sense that my message of looking past our external differences was getting across, encouraged me to want to continue. Which leads into my belief that Women’s Marches all over the world have been effective in promoting human rights and bringing us together in common humanity.

Women’s Marches have been instrumental in uniting millions across oceans and national boundaries. Initiatives such as these will be and will continue to be powerful and progressive forces in promoting the equity, respect, and understanding that our world so direly needs right now.

Those who were impacted by these marches were not only the people who came out, but also those who wanted to make a difference, and watched from home. In a time where our world seems to be falling apart, and where many individuals have felt alone, these marches offer hope, and inspire them to take action. They foster a sense of togetherness and inclusiveness. When you are connected to others that are passionate about the same types of issues, you can move mountains.

Additionally, these marches have generated awareness among legislators, policy-makers, and leaders about the issues that affect ordinary people. Sure, we can all try and do our individual part by writing letters or having meetings to express our views, but there is no substitute for strong, peaceful public expressions.

Speaking of peaceful public protests, among the millions of people who came out for the first and second Women’s March, there was not one incident of violence recorded. Watching millions of people in every corner of the world peacefully stand together on issues and policies, sends a strong and clear message to our leaders. 

North Carolina – CNN News

Most importantly, Women’s Marches have been a means of raising public awareness and stirring others to think and reflect on how these concerns affect us all. Pictures and stories have been all over the media. It has sure been hard to miss them. No matter what your views, people all over the world heard about and talked about these events.

All of these are absolutely essential for the progress of any democratic society. Without such initiatives, as Martin Luther King warned, we fall into a world where “few care, and fewer still act.” And that is a world I believe none of us would want to live in.

Courtesy of Jody MacPherson

Personally, all I can say is that as a speaker, a 14 year old Muslim female of a minority, the inspiration this event provided was like none other. Finally, I’d like to express my gratitude to all those that organized, volunteered, and came to out to these Marches.  Thank you for empowering voices and motivating change!

 

 

 

Image Sources: Featured (courtesy of Jon Yee), 1/2/3/4

this peculiar trait of being human (and other euphemisms for love) : a conversation with Yi Nuo Cheng

~ Chu ☆ ~
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I’m sure at some point, we’ve all had the urge to write our own book. But for most of us, trying to actually start that process usually puts a damper on that aspiration. However, meet the girl who’s braved this daunting task.

This is Yi Nuo, a grade 11 student at Sir Winston Churchill High School. Between conquering partial IB, maintaining her own blog (here!), being a flautist, and keeping the Instagram aesthetic alive, she has published her own book! Clocking in at over 150 pages, and over 90 poems, it is a legitimate, published book. Whoa.

(courtesy of Yi Nuo)

Fun little backstory for everyone: I’ve actually known (/known of) Yi Nuo since I was in grade four. Throw it back to elementary days, and you will find both of us at Hillhurst, me, an awkward 10-year-old, playing Temple Run, and admiring the super cool sixth graders, which is where Yi Nuo comes in. Admittedly, I was way too shy, and quite frankly, lame to actually talk to her, or any of the sixth graders. But luckily, I was quite the advanced internet sleuth and followed her Instagram. About five years later of mutual appreciation, I saw her post about how she had written a book. Finally given an excuse to meet her, I recently had the chance to sit down with the author herself to talk a little bit about the book “this peculiar trait of being human (and other euphemisms for love)“, and purchased a copy for myself! Captivating, and genuine, it was fantastic to meet a real-life author, and fellow student to talk about her unique endeavour. Here’s some of her insight:

Although Yi Nuo dabbled in poetry for quite some time before, her passion was really sparked when she joined her school’s slam poetry team last spring and went to a provincial tournament. Drawing inspiration from reading, and listening to other poets, and poems (her favourite being “Here”, written by Aman K Batra!), she continued to write, and compile little poems here and there. And then in summer 2017, she decided to check an item off her bucket list, and put them into a book!

(courtesy of Yi Nuo)

poetry and prose for aching hearts and hungry souls. this peculiar trait of being human (and other euphemisms for love) explores love, friendship, insecurity, beauty, identity, and purpose. a profound and raw confession is housed in each page. it is a journal of fears and passions alike; vulnerable, stirring, and empowering. a collection that needs no voice to speak volumes.

With the help of advice columns and self-publishing, she was able to get it published through CreateSpace. It was a bit of a walk in the dark, but she figured out how to do everything by herself. Being a visual artist as well, the illustrations accompanying poems are all original, cover photo included.

Everything in the book except for the barcode is done by me

While dealing with the stresses of high school, Yi Nuo sees poetry in particular as a creative outlet, being able to let out streams of consciousness, and make them into something productive.

You can really turn your negative emotions into a form of art. So even when you’re not having the best day, you’re able to look back and say : “Well at least I got a good poem out of it.” And then when you emerge from the other side, you get to relive what you were feeling, and reflect.

a little sneak peak (courtesy of Yi Nuo)

But apart from being a creative channel, through poetry, Yi Nuo’s also been able to explore, and develop her own style, playing with stylistic choices, capitalization, and different spacing. But further from visual aspects, she’s seen her poetry grow from a very personal expression that only she would understand, to incorporate very universal themes.

Even so, her poetry is so unique in that she writes for a demographic that isn’t often addressed. In response to the adults who brush off work penned by younger individuals, she says: “Maybe I can’t write poetry that’s for adults, or people who don’t share my life experiences. But I can express the experiences of people my own age. And a lot of the people who buy my book are people I know, who tell me that it really strikes a chord with them because they can relate to what I’m talking about.”

(courtesy of Yi Nuo)

Perhaps even more impressive to me was Yi Nuo’s blog, which she has run by herself successfully for quite some time now. When asked about how she continues to find inspiration, she told me : “What I really try to do is find inspiration everywhere, whether it’s watching poetry, reading books, blog posts, or drawing from people who matter to me, and exploring their stories. Never stop looking for inspiration. And have trust that it will always come back to you”

Surprisingly enough, although publishing a novel with a publication house is a major life goal, Yi Nuo’s also interested in the business side of things, specifically marketing: appealing, and relating to audiences. So as a little challenge, I asked for her best impromptu sales pitch for her book:

“this peculiar trait of being human and other euphemisms for love is an exploration of one person’s take on life. Although I haven’t been on this earth for a very long time, I like to think that I have learned a couple things here and there, but certainly have a lot of questions about life, and love. So if you want to read about my experiences, share some questions with me, or just read something that explores that, and opens up new questions for you, have a look!”

More info on how to purchase her book here!

The rise of AI – an impending crisis?

Gavin Dan
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Artificial intelligence permeates our everyday lives: present in our smartphone and computer “assistants”, orchestrating search engine suggestions, and dominating the scene of the NY Stock Exchange that quietly turns the cogs of the economy, the development of AI has undoubtedly revolutionized the modern world. The neural networks provide an increasingly capable and consistent alternative to the human mind in many major fields – production industries, data processing, and especially logical endeavors like chess or GO.

The rate at which AI developments have been made is astounding. The first electronic computer was built not even a century ago – a mere sliver on the timeline of human history – and yet, the application of electricity to simplify human lives has led to one of the most significant changes in the way we approach the world. CEO of Tesla and SpaceX Elon Musk has warned that artificial intelligence would eventually surpass and endanger the human capability, providing a tool for certain groups to exponentially consolidate power over the majority of people.

Elon Musk at The Summit 2013 (Credit to Dan Taylor @ Heisenberg Media)

I don’t want to really scare you, but it was alarming how many people I talked to who are highly placed people in AI who have retreats that are sort of ‘bug out’ houses, to which they could flee if it all hits the fan.

—James Barrat, speaker and documentary filmmaker

Perhaps the most straightforward way for this to occur is the replacement of workers by automation. Many critics predict the eventual domination of industry – especially manual labor – by robots, whose physical abilities can easily exceed that of a person’s. (There are already statistics for how likely jobs are to be replaced by automation, like here.) In June 2016, CBC reported that 42% of Canadian employment was at risk for this.

Will our children and grandchildren end up like this?

Historically, jobs have been threatened whenever labor-saving technological breakthroughs were made, such as the steam engine or automatic irrigation. In the years following the Industrial Revolution, textile workers especially suffered from being unable to adapt quickly to the invention of the spinning jenny.

It doesn’t stop there, though: even skilled and highly technical jobs may face a crisis as machines that can “learn” improve to the world’s standards. Machine progress is described in a trend called “Moore’s Law”, which roughly states that the number of transistors in a circuit doubles every 2 years – and transistors will get faster as well in addition to being able to cram more inside a given space:

Moore’s Law demonstrated in CPU Giant Intel

Where we would usually derive from history to predict the future, we are almost helpless now: something that could challenge human intelligence on our own planet has never emerged in the past. The benefits of developing AI, for now, seem to outweigh the negatives in our technologically driven world.

But fewer and fewer people know exactly how anything works, and most use computers without a thought for the circuitry inside, at the mercy of occasional system crashes or the whims of hackers. What happens when machines fully surpass our comprehension, and can perform astronomical tasks beyond our wildest dreams? This case, if any, is one where only time will tell.

Sources: 1/2/3/4

Images: Featured/2/3/4

 

Calgary’s “The Static Shift” Talk CTV’s “The Launch”, Rock Music + Being Young Musicians

Emily Donville
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At first glance, Calgary’s rock trio The Static Shift (made up of Mitchell Brady (Guitar / Vocals), Keone Friesen (Bass / Harmonica), and Isaiah Stonehouse (Drums / Background Vocals)) are decidedly different than most acts in today’s music scene.  Dressed in retro garments that reflect their sound, The Static Shift are an embodiment of their love of rock n’ roll and are nothing less than spectacular.  Since bursting onto the local music scene 5 years ago, the guys have made a name for themselves here in the city and regularly play gigs at local venues, all the while inspiring their peers and playing their hearts out for people of all ages and backgrounds. The three young musicians have yet to turn 20 years old but they already have 2 albums, a gig at LA’s Whiskey A Go Go, several awards and an appearance on a new CTV reality show under their belts, among other impressive achievements. I approached them recently to talk about CTV’s “The Launch”, their music, being young musicians in Calgary and everything in between and they were gracious enough to accept. So without further ado, keep on reading and be sure to watch them on “The Launch” which airs on January 24th at 8pm MST on CTV!

YAA: How did you guys meet and when did you guys form the band?

The Static Shift: “Mitchell and Keone met when they were 12, at a rock band camp here in Calgary. About 6 months after that, Keone messaged Mitchell on Facebook asking if he wanted to create a band together. They played together for a few years, going through multiple members, before finding Isaiah. Isaiah moved to Calgary in late 2012 when he was 14, and after only a few weeks of living in the city, ran into a paper ad on the wall of Axe Music (a local music shop here in Calgary) that read “14 year old boys looking for drummer”. The rest really is history, and we’ve been playing together for 5 years now!”

YAA: Where does the name “The Static Shift” come from?

TSS: “Before our first full length album came out, we actually went by the name “Stone of Nowhere”, a name thought of by a previous band member a few years back. People simply could never remember the name, so we knew we had to change it before we released our first full album. After many months of name ideas, we finally decided to settle it one afternoon at The Ship & Anchor, a restaurant here in Calgary on 17th Ave. Us three, and our dads, rated each name idea out of 5 using a deck of cards. It came down to three names, The Static Shift being one of them. It was only after deciding on The Static Shift that we realized how contradictory the name is. Static, being something that stays put, and Shift, being something that is always moving. We originally were drawn to it simply because of its uniqueness, and it reminded us of the retro image we are always trying to show, while still having a modern twist. Sadly, there’s no secret meaning behind this band name like there is with some.”

Mitchell Brady

YAA: What did you guys grow up listening to?

TSS: “We really did grow up listening to all sorts of music. Some major influences being, The Beatles (of course), Led Zeppelin, Super Tramp, and the Allman Brothers. Our parents introduced us to some of these artists, but many of them we found ourselves, through lots of exploring and digging around. There really are so many artists we could name.”

YAA: Who are your favorite fellow Calgarian musicians?

TSS: “There are some GREAT local bands here in Calgary, many who we’ve had the pleasure to play with. Some of our favourites include Crooked Spies, Amy Bishop, Timeboy, Free the Cynics, Fever Feel (who now reside in Victoria), and 10 Minute Detour.”

YAA: You released your debut album “Windsor Street” in 2014 and followed it up with your sophomore album “Common Bliss” last year. What did you learn after releasing the first record that you synthesized into your second record?

TSS: “I think one of the biggest things we learned between making the two records was to be more relaxed in the studio. Although we all still love Windsor Street, there were certainly some stressful moments in the studio, where we felt like we couldn’t “nail” a certain part. It was only when we learned to start treating recording more like we were still practicing in Keone’s basement that we put out the product we wanted.”

Isaiah Stonehouse

YAA: What’s your favourite song of yours to play live?

TSS: “This was a tough one, and we all have varying opinions!”
Keone – Elephant in the Room
Mitch – My Love
Isaiah – Somethin’ Else (a yet to be recorded song!)

YAA: When you guys started playing shows, you weren’t quite the age of majority here. Did you find the opportunities available to you guys were hindered by your age? If yes, how did you overcome this obstacle?

TSS: “We would say yes, there were certainly some opportunities hindered by our age. We were able to work around it, though. When we were 15, with the help of our dads, we were able to build a “mobile stage” that we drove around the city in, which allowed us to set up and play wherever we liked. We won’t lie, there were a few encounters with the police and by laws and what not, but it was totally worth it for us. At the same time though, venues like The Blues Can, The Ironwood, The New Black, and Ship & Anchor were extremely supportive in letting us play all age shows, and we can’t thank them enough for believing in us.”

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3KW5m9OMGVk

YAA: What’s your favourite venue to play in Calgary?

TSS: “The Ship & Anchor. They have been so supportive of us over the years, and playing shows there is simply a blast. It is always packed. Not only that, but they are one of the few places in Calgary that will actually clear the floor, to allow fans to come right up to the stage. We highly recommend it.”

YAA: Recently you’ve started hosting youth jams at The Blues Can. What inspired you guys to do that?

TSS: “I think for us, it comes back to this idea of giving back. 5 years ago, places like The Blues Can were so open to letting us come in and play, and now it’s our turn to continue this. Also, we just love playing, and jamming for that matter. But really, that’s how we started. We want to give back, like others did to us when we were young. We really do want to lead the charge in providing more opportunities for young musicians to play here in Calgary.”

YAA: Do you think there’s enough opportunities for musicians under the age of 18 in Calgary and if not, what do you think the city of Calgary can do to improve the scene?

TSS: “No, absolutely not. We are making progress, but there needs to be more all age venues, and different bar licenses allowing minors to play later. We believe the city should invest some dollars into providing a few more venues like The New Black, which was forced to shut its doors a few years ago. As well, there needs to be a more accepting culture towards young musicians. They are more talented than you think, and really, they are the future!”

Keone Friesen

YAA: You guys are slated to host a youth workshop and play a show in Golden, BC next month. What can youth expect to learn at your workshop?

TSS: “There are so many things we’d love to teach next month at the workshop in Golden. I think ultimately, a message we want to get across is that as a young musician, IT IS POSSIBLE to pursue a career in music. It does take hard work, commitment, and willingness to practice your craft, though. If you are willing to do these things, the opportunities WILL come, just like they have for us. Things like how to develop a practice schedule, stage presence, and how to convey yourself as an artist are also things we have learned over the years that we would love to pass on.”

YAA: You guys are participants on the inaugural season of CTV’s The Launch. Describe the moment you guys found out you guys were gonna be on the show.

TSS: “Yes, we are!!! The whole experience really has been a blast. When we first found out we were for sure going to be on the show, we were actually about to play a gig at Broken City here in Calgary with Apollo Suns (a fantastic band out of Winnipeg, check them out!). As you can imagine, playing at Broken City that night was all the more exciting, knowing all that was to come.”

YAA: What was it like working with Dann Huff and Nikki Sixx?

TSS: “Absolutely amazing, really. It was such an honour just to bounce ideas and notions off of them. They both have been through so much, and know everything there is to know about the music industry. Furthermore, they know what it takes to create a hit song, let alone launch a career. We cannot wait for everyone to see us with them on The Launch!”

YAA: What’s your favourite part about the show’s concept?

TSS: “We loved that it was a completely different take on the classic music TV show. While it is still a reality show, it isn’t always focused on the drama. Rather, the music itself takes centre stage, and that was the most exciting part about it for us.”

YAA: When can people watch your episode?

TSS: “January 24th (Wednesday), 8pm mountain time (9pm everywhere else), on CTV!”

YAA: How would you guys describe your music to somebody who’s never heard it before?

TSS: “Loud. Hah! There are many ways we could describe our music. One of our favourites is, “a classic rock and roll sound, with a modern twist”. Zeppelin and the Allman Brothers are certainly influences, but we are inspired by many modern bands as well. And not just rock bands, but all types of artists! We would name them all, but we could fill an entire book with artists that have inspired us.”

YAA: If you could play a festival with 5 other acts (from the past or present, dead or alive) who would you guys pick and why?

TSS: “Wow, great question. Honestly, our answer would change everyday. If we had to pick 5 for today, we’d go with the Allman Brothers, David Bowie, Mac Demarco, Alabama Shakes, and Tame Impala.”

YAA: Any words of encouragement for fellow aspiring musicians?

TSS: “Don’t be afraid to be yourself, have fun, and don’t take yourself too seriously!”

YAA: And finally, any parting words?

TSS: “Long live good music and rock n’ roll! Thank you for reaching out to us, this was a pleasure.”

Huge thanks to Mitchell, Keone and Isaiah for chatting with me. If you’re 18 or older, you can catch them at their next gig this Saturday at Mikey’s on 12 avenue. Tickets are 10$ and the show starts at 9:00pm. For more information click here.

Wanna stay in touch with them? Check out their social media!

Facebook

Twitter

Instagram

Youtube

Website

(All photos received are courtesy of Natalie Cole from Bell Media or retrieved from the artist’s Facebook/Website. NOT our own)

The Struggles and Perks of Exam Break

Rosie Zhao
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Whether it’s the last week of your first semester or you’ve already entered exam break, we are all experiencing end-of-the-semester woes— the weather is erratic and cold, long hours are spent sifting through your heap of textbooks and notes (or putting off that work to do anything else BUT THAT), and after all of those painstaking exams, you’re left in the face of a whole new semester. But admittedly, all of this free time — albeit usually spent studying — to focus on exams can be a lifesaver. As we brace ourselves for the next week and a half, let’s look at it from both sides:

STRUGGLE: The scheduling of your exams is less than optimal.

Whether you have 3 exams back-to-back, or your exam is on the last day of break and you have one day to unwind before being thrown into the second semester (hello, fellow Physics 30 diploma test-takers!), your personal final exam schedule isn’t ideal— but then again, what IS the ideal exam schedule?

THE PERK: You’re either ripping the band-aid, or being gifted more time to prepare.

With exams in close proximity, there isn’t time to fall out of that hard-wired study mode— and just like that, you’ve got all of your exams out of the way, with hopefully several days to recover before the second semester! On the other hand, having spaced-out exams means that studying thoroughly for each subject won’t be so overwhelming. You can make better use of your resources, whether that’s a teacher’s tutorial time or going through those practice exams.

 

But the STRUGGLE: the whole studying process.

The questions of “how?” and “where to start?” come flooding in as you bring up all of your semester’s worth of material. You only have so much time until the exam, and you have to allot this time to practicing problems, reviewing course material, reading through the textbook, creating study guides… but it’s hard to determine what the most effective process is, and you begin to question if you’re actually retaining any of the information your eyes gloss over in the textbook.

 

THE PERK: Exam break is a time dedicated to figuring this process, and there are ways to optimize your studying.

Imagine juggling regular school with preparing for final exams; it makes our current reality seem a little more fortunate. No one has a perfect formula for studying to get a great mark on the exam, and understanding the material requires reading, practising, and focusing. Avoid the extreme ends of studying, whether it’s ignoring your studying until the day before the exam, or staying up until 3 AM every single night to drill concepts into your brain. Stick to the previous studying methods that you used throughout the semester: they’re tried and true.

 

STRUGGLE: You want to hang out with your friends with this free time, but you feel a moral obligation to focus on the task at hand.

Winter break was just a few weeks ago, but it feels like it’s been ages— or you/your friends weren’t available to spend time together during that period. It’s so tempting to use one of your free weekdays to organize a gathering with friends, and the potential burnout from studying doesn’t help.

THE PERK: Your friends are in the same situation, so you can use this time to be productive and enjoy yourself, or to just unwind and give yourself a breather.

It’s not healthy to constantly remain focused on one task, especially for studying. Giving yourself breaks is important, and that friend gathering might be the one thing to help you feel ready to pick up your textbook again. Alternatively, it might be necessary to give yourself a change in study environment; although it’s not always the most productive, friend study groups can be effective in making the studying process a little more enjoyable, filling in possible gaps in your knowledge, and finding a collective to share your exam struggles with.

 

STRUGGLE: The exam. Need I say more?

A whole blog post could probably be dedicated to the pains of the exam environment. That feeling of dread when you read the first question of the test. Believing every question is designed to trick you. Suddenly blanking out on a question. Trying to reason your way to the answer of a knowledge-based question when it’s a nearly lost cause. The pressure of a timed environment. The constant sniffling reverberating off the walls because it’s cold season. That one student in front of you who won’t stop tapping their pencil on the desk.

PERK: Once you’re done, it’s done. Congratulations, a course has been completed and you can move on!

Alright, it may be hard to look at test-taking from an optimistic perspective. But in the grand scheme of things, this final exam will take up a couple of hours maximum and you can rejoice about finishing the course afterwards. In fact, some people prefer writing exams as a final culmination of a course rather than something else like a massive final project. Furthermore, despite its other potential implications, the security of having double time to take the exam is reassuring. And lastly, for some of our grade 12 students, this exam might mark the last time you have to open a textbook pertaining to that one course that was… less than enjoyable, to say the least. Don’t get unnecessarily hung up on a single exam: push through and move on!

 

STRUGGLE: The second semester is on the horizon.

You’ve barely recuperated from the first semester, and four brand new courses are waiting to start once exam break is over. With everything that is happening right now, thinking about what is ABOUT to happen just adds to the stress!

THE PERK: The second semester is on the horizon!

Like a true optimist, think about the opportunities and the clean slate that you’re given for the second semester. For my fellow grade 12s, this is the culminating final semester of high school— the last six months to top off three years of hard work. Maybe you have a spare block this semester or you have your favourite course/teacher in your schedule; nevertheless, the second semester has yet to happen so it’s a good time to reorganize and keep the highs of last semester while fixing the lows.

Wishing everyone the best of luck on their exams!

 

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Should We Continue Funding Space Exploration?

Jesse Lee
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For thousands of years, mankind has stared up into the heavens and seen the stars. Now the dream of reaching them has never been closer. To say that we should halt our operations here, when we have so much more potential, would be preposterous. The space program has achieved things that we had never seen before, and will continue to do so. In under no circumstances is the space program a waste of public funds, as it helps serve society in a different way, just not the same way medical sciences do.

In the past, space exploration had multiple positive side effects, namely the inventions that spurred for its research. If we never had the dream of going beyond our atmosphere and exploring the universe, we would have never invented satellite television, nor would we have memory foam pillows. These inventions were all byproducts from the research done when the great “Space Race” between the Soviet Union and USA was at its peak. Centuries before, the greatest frontier was the oceans for people like Christopher Columbus and now outer space is that vast ocean waiting to be explored.

Only about 0.5% of the US federal budget goes to NASA, and about 19% of it goes to military spending. So if you really want to better serve humanity, cut the military’s massive annual spending of 523.9 billion dollars. Lately, the talk of colonization of Mars is a new challenge, as it may potentially be a habitable planet, just like Earth. If someday in the future we could live on Mars, it would be a potential solution to many of the problems here on earth, like overpopulation and climate change, something that is much more important than military.

With the space program’s constant ability to dazzle us, we can expect tremendous things in the future. Some examples already include the aforementioned colonization of mars, or the James Webb telescope. SpaceX has already managed to land a rocket upright, so we can only imagine what is in store for us. Constant innovation and exploration is what defines human beings, and it is these advancements in technology and ideas, that makes our society so much better. We can expect a continuous stream of technologies and breakthroughs that will help not only in our endeavors in space, but back at home on Earth as well.

So no, we should never stop exploring, innovating, and learning. Perhaps the greatest achievement the space program has done of all, is the fact that it provides students with opportunities such as the United Space School, and gives them a light at the end of the tunnel to look for. Thousands of kids look up to the stars like our ancestors did, but this time, it is quite possible that they can reach it. Programs like these, allow kids like ourselves to dream of  “slipping the surly bonds of earth, to touch the face of god”.

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What It Means To Be A Feminist

Julieanne Acosta
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When I tell people about feminism or show any passion about the topic in the slightest, I get glares all the time. Too many people have come to misunderstand what feminism stands for and refuse to learn more about it unless it’s in a funny meme (in which case, it still manages to convey a grand total of nothing but stigmas towards feminism) . I don’t think feminism should be such a controversial topic in the first place. From being an “angry feminist” or just being seen as whiny, the idea of feminism has become a laughing matter when it shouldn’t be. I’ve decided to use this post to talk more about what feminism is, and what it isn’t.

Common misconceptions of Feminism

  1. Only females can be feminists, it’s in the name! : Just because the name is feminism does not mean men aren’t allowed to be feminists! In fact, males who are feminists are not as rare as you may think. It’s all about understanding what feminism truly is. It’s not a club that your only allowed to join if and only if your female.
  2. Feminism is about raising females above males. It’s all about making females the dominant gender : NO. Feminism is truly about equality. It’s about bringing up the oppressed.
  3. Feminists only start arguments: The angry feminist meme can assure you that this is something people tend to think. Sometimes people get defensive but it’s also important to further feminism through educating people.
  4. Feminists don’t care about men: This only is thought because some think that feminism is about disregarding men and #girl power. Nevertheless it still is about empowering females but that doesn’t mean that we hate men all of a sudden. Go back to example one and two, feminism is for anyone who believes in equality.
  5. Feminists only fight for white cis straight women: Feminism is about all women.

Somewhere in the history of feminism these misconceptions came up and started arising controversy around the idea. So what exactly is feminism? Why does it matter?

Feminism strives to make masculinity and femininity equal. The most common question I tend to get is Well if it’s about equality, why is it called feminism? Why not call it equalism? 

 

The idea of calling it feminism is to bring up the oppressed. In which, in this case is femininity and females. Calling it equalism would suggest that the pedestal men are sitting on be lowered to where women stand. That’s not what feminists are asking for. We want to bring up females to where men already are. Hence, gender equality. 

And finally, if it’s not supporting all women, (from poc, trans women, sex workers, lgbtq+ women, etc) in other words, if it’s not intersectional, it’s not feminism.

Images : FI 1 2 3

The Hidden Consequences of Test Accommodations

Gavin Dan
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* First and foremost, I’d like to declare my lack of opinion on this matter – in today’s precarious political environment, one false move (or uttered phrase) can detonate landmines of backlash. I’m simply attempting to shed light on certain points of a practice that is widely accepted today, which deserves consideration, as objectively as I can.

There is much mixed opinion about tests, standardized to any degree – whether they serve the intended purpose of distinguishing the capable, and if students end up learning to perform on the test rather than learning to improve themselves. This year marked the first that all Alberta diploma exams had their time limit raised from 3 to 6 hours, for all students, a privilege historically reserved for those requiring special accommodation. This brought up an interesting question in my mind – whether advantages to certain groups of people is truly a conscientious practice.

Firstly, the real world doesn’t sink to lower standards for those who are disadvantaged. Most employers won’t consider impaired workers who require special treatment to be able to perform at the level of others. Are we really doing the disadvantaged a favor by effectively telling them they don’t need to adapt to the harsh circumstances we all inevitably face, and can rely instead on accommodations?

It’s obvious that it isn’t fair for certain people to excessively suffer, and individuals are not, unfortunately, presented with equal opportunity to succeed. One may argue in favor of extra time for someone with hyperactivity disorder, because it wasn’t her fault that she was born with the condition, and we should do our best to accommodate her. But likewise, is it the fault of the mentally unstable young man for his history of familial violence, who cannot focus properly due to his emotional scarring? And what about those who suffer from depression? Panic disorders? Social anxiety? As these conditions increase in obscurity and become more difficult to accurately pinpoint, where do we draw the line as to what conditions are allowed special treatment? How do we know which ones affect performance in tests at all?

And this brings me to my final point: the primary way to calculate how much advantages should be provided to certain groups is to allot them enough benefits so that their results meet a reasonable, or the same, average as the majority. But people can be infinitesimally divided into groups, based on any variety of factors: Caucasians, male Caucasians, male Caucasians over 20, male Caucasians over 20 but under 25 who were born northeastern European countries and have brown eyes… all the way down to the individual. And so the most extreme of accommodation on assessments may be that every individual is provided with just enough advantages so that they all end up with exactly 70%.

Extra time may promote the homogenization of learners

But this most polar scenario does not demonstrate equality of opportunity – it is equality of outcome, which strips humans of the motivations to work hard and push forwards because any inadequacies will simply be compensated for. This sort of equality is inexplicably reminiscent of communist movements that caused catastrophes in the 20th century, and is perhaps what we are unconsciously approaching in our educational system of the West.

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Avoiding Senioritis: Tips for a “Fresh Start” In Semester 2

Dylan Zhao
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With exam break coming into full swing, I think we can all say we’ve been at the point where our motivation starts to decline just a little bit. It makes sense, too, because with the first half of the school year officially concluded, you really deserve that break. I’m not here to say that you don’t. You should be able to kick back and relax for a week or two, but don’t forget that you still have another half of the year to finish.

I think the current exam break situation is especially hard on my fellow Grade 12s. With most of our university applications done and out of the way, and our transcripts sealed and sent, it is extremely tempting to maybe let ourselves slip just a little bit for the next few months. But remember: universities still want to see your final grades by the time Grade 12 is finished. We aren’t off the hook just yet, so don’t let a few last-minute months of slacking off ruin the hard work you’ve built up over the past 3 years.

But, like most things, maintaining that discipline is easier said than done. That’s why I’ve compiled a few tips in this post which may hopefully make your transition into semester 2 a little easier to manage and keep you on top of your studies, while still enjoying the greater freedom that comes with your high school career coming to a close. (That being said, Grade 10s and 11s reading this may find some use out of some of these tips as well!)

1. Prepare a new notebook.

Either rip out the used pages of your old Semester 1 notebook, or buy a new one altogether for Semester 2. No, this is not a gimmick. There have been actual scientific studies conducted into the idea of working with a “clean slate” and its benefits for your state of mind; namely, you’ll feel a surge of motivation and find it easier to keep good study habits up if you start from square one. While you’re at it, consider cleaning out your locker, binder, pencil cases, and all your other school materials as well. The cleaner and more organized you feel at the start of Semester 2, the more prepared you will to hit the ground running.

2. Define a schedule or planner.

It doesn’t have to be flashy or colorful, or even physical (why not set up your calendar on your phone, for notification reminders?). So long as you have something to tell you everything you need to do, and when you need to do it by, I guarantee you’ll be able to breathe a sigh of relief in knowing your life is planned out. Every task seems easier when it’s broken down, and your seemingly endless to-do lists will look a lot less intimidating when you actually write it all out. More than that, it also makes it less likely for you to procrastinate, so that you actually get your work done. If you weren’t in the habit of using a schedule or planner before, consider the new semester a great opportunity to try it out.

3. Involve yourself in an extracurricular commitment.

One of the main reasons why senioritis is a problem is because students experience a lack of motivation when they no longer have pressing commitments. You can, therefore, avoid it by forcing yourself to commit to something. And why not learn something new or develop a skill in the process? Every high school in Calgary has dozens of extracurricular opportunities you can involve yourself in, from Model UN clubs to environmental advocacy groups. When you are required to show up for a meeting every week, or continually have homework tasks assigned to you, it’ll be easier to keep up with school assignments as well.

4. Seek employment.

Eventually, we all have to graduate and find some kind of employment in order to support ourselves. That’s why I’m making it my own personal goal (and I highly recommend you do the same!) to have some work experience before I graduate. Getting an early start in high school will not only give you early exposure to the professional world, thereby adding to your experience and potential connections for references, etc., but also teach you the kind of responsibility that will be expected all the time after graduation. It also doesn’t have to be a difficult process! Programs exist by the dozens dedicated to helping youth find employment, whether independent or as a part of larger organizations like Youth Central. Seek them out and they can help you craft a resume, cover letter, conduct mock interviews, and provide likely anything else you need to be prepared for your first job.

5. Set aside time for fun.

If you follow some of the tips above, I think you’ll be much less likely to burn out and suffer the effects of senioritis. But what will make the process even more enjoyable is if you still have all the fun you want to anyway, just so long as you schedule it for after you finish your assignments and important commitments. Just so long as you don’t treat all of Semester 2 as one huge party, you really should enjoy yourself. After all, you made it through almost all of high school.

 

Image Sources

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Me Ranting About Things (Part 3)

Hilary Guo
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Hello again people who like to read about my student breakdowns! I hope January has been treating you guys well. Me, on the other hand, I’ve been (you’ve guessed it) quite stressed. I don’t know about anyone else, but for me, IT’S EXAM SEASON RIGHT NOW AND I AM ON THE VERGE OF A MELTDOWN. But other than that January has been pretty great so far!

I’m unsure about other schools’ exam schedules but my first semester ends in January and lucky for me, final exams come with it! Now you might think, “oh, it’s only the first semester, you don’t even have to take that many tests!” OH REALLY? I’m sorry but I was not one of those fortunate people to have two easy, relaxing classes (if they even exist). Because the world loves me, as of right now, I’m studying for French social studies, French math and AP science. Every single person who I’ve told what my classes are this term has given me their deepest condolences. “Sigh, nobody deserves this,” they’d say. Sure, maybe for some of you, those three classes together are practically a walk in the park. But for me, it’s nowhere near a walk in the park. It’s more like a riding a bike. But the bike is on fire. And the ground is on fire. And everything is on fire. 🙂

I make jokes to conceal the fact that I am constantly screaming on the inside. There is just so much to learn! So much to remember! And the exam is worth around 25% of the final grade so if I do bad on it, I can start writing my will now. I have so many notes to review, so many pages to read! Boy, I’m going to have a blast in college, aren’t I? I’ve forgotten ALL about chemistry and biology! Sorry, but what even is an acid? What even is a plant?? Not to mention, I have to independently learn about climate?? What even is climate?? Wind currents and albedos?? I mean, I read the textbook and I understand the words. I just don’t understand the words together.

Not to mention the rest of science! What do you mean I have to memorize all the parts of the microscope?? WHY MUST I DO THAT?? Chemistry is alright and biology makes my brain hurt, but physics, OH, physics. If physics were a person, I’d leave them on read 24/7. Chemistry was kind, biology was tolerable. Physics on the other hand… Let’s just say tears were shed for that subject.

Science? More like SciOHMYGODNOence. Did I mention that my science exam is tomorrow?? It is! 78 points total and 30% of my final grade! How joyous! Excuse me while I go hide in my closet and cry. But it’s fine. It’s just that I’ve gotten no sleep because I’ve been staying up trying to make sense of my notes while remembering how a microscope works. And that I’m stressed all the time. And that I have no time for anything else yet I always find time to procrastinate until 11:59 at night. It’s fine. All good. Totally not crying inside.

And don’t even GET me started on social studies. That’s gonna be a no from me, it’s not happening. I CAN’T SOCIAL STUDIES FOR THE LIFE OF ME. I’d tell you what I’m learning except that I honestly don’t know. I have no clue how I’m going to handle social (WHICH IS ON MONDAY BY THE WAY), so in the meantime, if you could please keep me in your prayers, that would be amazing, thanks. At 11:11, wish that I will pass social. When an eyelash falls off, wish that I will pass social and blow it away. Wish that I pass social as your birthday wish. Wish that I pass social and throw a coin in a fountain. It’s much appreciated.

I can’t wait to come home after my last exam and literally do nothing except watch Netflix for the rest of day. That’s the dream that motivates me to get through these tests. Whoever is reading this, and whether or not you have exams this month, I believe in you. If I can do well in math without doing any of the homework, you can ace your finals. You’ve got this, I’ve got this, and we’ll see each other on the other side. Good luck my friends, may you all get 90% or above.

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How to Write Fake Poetry

Marcus Chung
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Poetry is weird. I’m not going to lie, I barely understand any poetry that I read. I either take the meaning way too literally, or not literally enough. To make matters even worse, poems are often very hard to write, and every Language Arts class from grade 1 – 12 requires that students read and write poetry. However, within the past few years of my life, I have grown quite adept at writing what I like to call “fake poetry”. It sounds like poetry, looks like poetry, but is easier to write than poetry. English teachers hate him! This man found out how to break poetry in (I haven’t counted yet) easy steps! Read more to find out!

So, what is fake poetry? Fake poetry are poems that are not well crafted, but instead play to the audience’s emotions and trick them into thinking your poetry is better than it actually is. But how do we do this?

The first step with all poetry is to consider the purpose of your poem. Poetry is pretty much an art, and like all art, is intended to make your audience feel an emotion. In this step, pick the emotion. Fake poetry should always take on sober tones that most people can relate to. Examples would be grief, anger, or being alone…oh, what’s that? The last one only applies to me? Regardless, the weight of these topics makes it so people automatically think that your poem is more meaningful, and the relatability of it helps deliver your emotion to the audience. If you’re comfortable with your audience and confident in your ability, humour also works. All in all, both humour and soberness are meant to naturally improve how the audience receives your poem. Below are some topics I’ve seen do well.

               Serious Topics                         Humorous Topics
  • Love
  • Splitting up with friends.
  • Personal doubt.
  • Hopes for the future.
  • Bullying.
  • You’re probably a young adult if       you’re reading this. You know despair, you know stress. Pick a feeling that you hate and write about it.

 
  • Hecking censorship.
  • The consumption of human babies.
  • Chili peppers in automobiles.
  • The negative effects on drugs on lampposts.
  • Pretty much anything can be used for humor.

 

Second things second, you need to choose how you’re going to write your poem. Most poems are rhyming or freestyle. When writing Fake Poetry, I suggest you go with freestyle, as you have to follow less rules. Forcing your poem to rhyme can also make it sound silly when poorly executed. Any other poetry form doesn’t really work. Haikus are generally too short for any assignment or presentation. Limericks have the negatives of both rhyming poems and Haikus, and really no outstanding positives. Acrostics are barely poetry. So barely that I won’t even consider using this format for what I call “Fake Poetry”. Almost every other poetry format can just be considered a type of rhyming poem.

Now, keep in mind that the meaning of poetry is almost entirely up to the interpretation of your audience. This being said, as long as your poem makes the slightest bit of sense, then people will find some hidden message in it. Focus on making your poem sound as poetic as possible. Great tools for this are similes, metaphors, and other figures of speech. Oxymorons work especially well. If your poem sounds cool, then people will like it. This combined with your sober topic will pretty much make the actual message of your poem irrelevant. I also recommend using edgy words like fade, lost, heartbreak, and silence for maximum effect.

Finally, we have presenting your poem. This kind of makes or breaks your poem. Good presentation can salvage a bad poem, but the opposite is sadly not applicable. If anything, just be confident and express a lot of emotion.

Now, let’s take a look at a piece of Fake Poetry. The following poem is not well written in the slightest, but it was deemed good enough for me to win a clock with it. How? The power of fake poetry prevailed!

Fleeting

What if, all good things lasted forever?

If there was no Fall, but only Spring?

With new life all around us, and no leaves dying, and falling, and rotting.

If that song, if that dance  never stopped?

The drums in our hearts never ceased beating?

Never were replaced with a cold, empty, lifeless, silence

If all our dreams came true?

And people would be happy,

Because there could be no wars, when peace never ended.

There would be no need to mourn, when death doesn’t exist.

And heartbreak

Heartbreak can’t happen, if love never fades.

Fades

Fading

Fading away

When something you cherish is slipping away

Little by little

Pulling itself out of your hands

Too slowly for you to care

And too quickly for you to stop it.

Until one day

You’ll look down and

What you valued so much, is lost.

Gone with the wind.

And then I  wonder.

What if there was no good things?

Could you feel longing for something you don’t know yet?

Like an inner thirst that you just simply can’t quench, no matter what you do.

Could you hate something you have never felt?

Can something split, without first being whole?

And would people be sad, without first knowing happiness?

Can friendships end before they begin?

Like some sort of a twisted genesis.

Do we mourn those whom we don’t know?

Or do we shun their pale masks, reaching out for us.

Futilely begging us to care.

           Is it better to never have a gift

Than know it,

To know it

To enjoy it,

To relish it.

To Love it

Then lose it.

Than to know you’ll lose it.

How you’ll lose it.

When you’ll lose it.

And never being able to stop that loss.

Never stopping being afraid of that loss

No matter how hard you try.

To tell yourself

Everything will be okay.

Maybe there is such thing as a stupid question.

Because I know already

Good things don’t last forever.

The sun sets in the brightest places.

The best of stories inevitably end.

And courage,

Courage is just a placebo

Like a drug

Getting you high on confidence

Before it gives way to fear

Fear

A terrible fear

That pulls at me

Crushes me.

Makes me want to cry.

A fear

No not a fear

It’s too late for that

It’s a knowledge,

A knowledge

That one day

The voices that I  love to hate will fade

The faces you see every day will disappear.

That I’ll eventually laugh to the last joke

That one day.

I’ll walk out of this school

And realize, that was the last time I’ll see most of you.

 

Phew. Let’s take a look at why people liked this poem, starting with topic.

I wrote this poem in the final year of Grade 9 as a farewell address to my class. Our class hadn’t changed since Grade 7, so we were all close, and most of us were sad to split up and go to different high schools. I took this emotion and focused in on it during the ending in order to make others really feel it.

Next up, I used a lot of contrast like “love to hate” or “there would be no need to mourn, when death doesn’t exist.” I also put good use to those edgy words. The entire poem is filled with fade, fading, loss, death, and other depressing words. The title, “Fleeting” is also pretty melancholy.

Finally, my presentation of this was overly dramatic. I also had a voice crack in the middle of it. It was really loud. That’s the last impression most of my classmates got of me. Feels good man.

I hoped you enjoyed reading this article, and I wish you luck in writing your future poems! Remember to smash that subscribe button. haHAA

Marcus Chung

hmm. False Poet sounds pretty cool. It’s like the False Prophet from Bioshock.

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