Why is there an Olympic craze?

As winter Olympics approach us, we seem to approach something I like to call extreme athleticism. For those of who are unaware of Olympics, excuse me as I lift up the stone under which you have been living- Olympics began in Athens in 19 1896, and this year, the Winter Olympics are being held in Sochi, Russia¹. While we are at it, I personally believe Russia should abolish anti gay laws especially considering (Stereotype AHEAD)* Vodka reduces healthy sperm count and increases estrogen levels in men. ^{2 I personally am against stereotyping (and anti gay laws) however I appreciate when people are able to make similar neuron connections as me and take a “only joke intended” comment as a “joke only.”}

Let me begin by defining extreme athleticism. It’s the –ism that explains the emotions and passion we people have for a bunch of people who play games. What else justifies the situation when a flames game sounds like scream fest? (WOW, he’s skating!?!!!)

Many people will actually go to Sochi, and many more will watch live telecast of the games as I sit and watch TV (also known as procrastinate on homework). I have never been able to understand the adrenaline of watching a few people get concussions for a rubber ball, sorry puck. As you can tell, I have minimal interest and knowledge about games elegantly called sports. In fact, another important term that I feel obliged to introduce is extreme lazism. This is the default nature of superior Homo sapiens. Those who watch Olympic sports on TV holding a bag of buttered popcorn also deserve a spot in this Society of Extreme Lazy Organisms.

This criticism of athleticism and activity in general is a result of lazism. I can’t play sports, which is why I am lazy, so I don’t appreciate athleticism, so I don’t play sports, therefore I can’t play games, which is why I am lazy.

If you think about this too long, you can actually end up exercising some neurons, so STOP.

¹http://www.olympic.org/sochi-2014-winter-olympics

²http://www.fertilityfactor.com/alcohol-sperm.html