Introduction:
Hello! Today I’ll be writing about self-appreciation and self-love. For myself and I’m assuming others, we struggle to love ourselves. Oftentimes, because of the lack of self-love, we look for validation from outside ourselves. This can look like accolades, accomplishments, friends, relationships, appearance, etc. We unconsciously tie our self-worth to the things that we pursue outside of us. It explains why when we lose friends, get a bad grade, fail to achieve something, our self-worth plummets to a nauseating low. Moreover, this feeling is exacerbated by the internet, where the image of glamorized lifestyles are rampant. Seeing ourselves failing and others succeeding causes comparison and results in self-loathing. Furthermore, it makes us feel competitive with others to an unhealthy amount; when someone else experiences success it must mean we have failed. It feels like a zero-sum game– if someone wins, the other loses.
In the pursuit of external accolades, we may begin to realize that we do not feel any different. If you still hate yourself, no amount of praise, money, or love will change that. It will provide temporary solace, an illusion of value and self-worth. The root of the problem lies within, and the lack of love we have for ourselves. We have to learn to love ourselves unconditionally and change our perspective of ourselves. We have to accept the less glamorous areas of ourselves.
Here is how we can cultivate self-love:
- Acknowledge your reality:
- Think about your situation and circumstance in an uncritical manner (try to not scold yourself)
- Look at both sides equally: what did you do well and what could you have done better
- Accept what has happened and forgive yourself
- Acknowledge yourself:
- Nobody is you, and there will never be another you in this life
-
- Challenge negative thoughts about yourself, think about these thought logically and question them
- Treat yourself as valuable person:
- Make yourself a priority through the food you eat, exercise, taking time for yourself to relax
- This will cause a ripple effect to the your career, your eating habit, exercise
Sources:
How to Love Yourself in a World That Says You’re Not Enough | Branden Collinsworth | TEDxUNLV