The Useless Web #1: Weird and Confusing Products

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Introduction: Why write a series on useless websites?

Here’s the thing:I spend WAY too much time on the internet, and sometimes, my internet wandering takes me to the weirdest and most useless places on the world wide web. This “useless web” is extremely hilarious and entertaining to me, but most other internet users usually ignore it. Because of this, I’ve decided to start this series of blog posts, with each post chronicling my experience on a different useless website!

All of the websites in this series will come from theuselessweb.com, one of the most well-known “useless website” databases. However, if you decide to check the database out yourself, please note that some of the websites in the database contain mature content. (I will not be covering any websites with mature content in this series.)

With that being said, on to our first post…

Today’s Website: Sell me something weird or confusing!

We’ll start the series off with one of the most extensive sites on the useless web: weirdorconfusing.com. As its name suggests, this website sends you to eBay pages with the weirdest, most confusing products being sold on the internet at the simple click of a button.  When I first entered the site, the following screen greeted me:

Immediately after I clicked the “please” button, my first product appeared:

Product #1: …Nothing?

That’s right, nothing.

We start off our tour of weird and confusing products with this “Gift Of Nothing For The Person Who Has Everything”. The seller’s product description is probably the most sarcastic thing I have ever read:

We all have that friend that has everything and you never know what to get her/him, but today is your lucky day! You can buy them nothing! Nothing is precious, simple and sacred! Once the pack is open, they will be able to experience the gift of nothing, absolutely nothing! They will be able to say they got nothing for their birthday, and you will feel prouder than ever!

 

Basically, this product is just empty packaging with nothing inside of it, and considering the entire point of selling a product is to sell something, selling nothing whatsoever is a very strange choice to make. Also, the product sells for $10.40, and that’s a LOT of money for nothing…

Product #2: The best 2020 calendar ever

Goats-in-Trees-2020-Square-Calendar
Who doesn’t want to see goats in trees every day?

Behold, a calendar featuring only pictures of goats on trees! As weird as this product is, I honestly want it, and it seems like others agree with me. When I looked at this product’s eBay page, 12 other people were viewing the exact same page! The seller also guarantees “100% buyer satisfaction”, and the product description confirms this by stating:

This calendar is Brand New! A new, unread, unused book in perfect condition with no missing or damaged pages.

Everything about this product is PERFECT to me! If only I had $13.08 to spend right now…

Product #3: A rare treasure worth more than its weight in gold

A flaming hot cheeto… shaped like a BALD EAGLE??!

When I first saw this flaming hot cheeto going for a whopping 1,000 dollars, I thought the seller was being ridiculous. However, I soon learned that this was no ordinary cheeto! It was shaped like an eagle perching on a branch, and for that, I owed it all of my money. I had heard of strangely shaped items being sold online for ridiculous prices, and I was excited to finally see one of these items on my own journey through eBay. This product was not personally appealing to me, but it was still a beloved internet classic that I was excited to come across.

Conclusion

Overall, weirdorconfusing.com is an enjoyable website to look through, since it’s always fun to laugh at the most ridiculous things people try to sell online. You might even find a product that you personally want, like the goats on trees calendar for me. The seller descriptions, the customer reviews, and sometimes the ridiculous pricing you will find are hilarious as well. Because of this, I strongly recommend that you check this website out if you have the time-you will not regret it!

 

Sources: 1/2/3/4/5/6