Top Five Ways to Say Something Rude… Politely

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Infographic by Anna Murynka

5. Make them feel guilty, but do it nicely!
Ex.: I hate it when you text other people when you talk to me. —–> You must have so many friends, always texting you like that… I usually don’t text people because I like talking face-to-face so much, but you know, I can read my book if you’re in the middle of something, hang on a second…

4. Make it seem like a good thing… Sort of.
Ex.:  You spit when you talk! —-> Oh that’s so cute, you spit a little bit when you talk. It’s so interesting to find people’s quirks. Like people who are lefties, or people with one green eye and one blue eye!

3.  Disguise it in a rant!
Ex.: You dress like a harlot. —->  You know, fashion has been a real interest of mine lately, I’ve really become concerned with dressing for your body and your image. Like, I feel bad for shapely girls who, instead of accentuating their curves, wear outfits that bring out their stomach! I realized I had to stop following trends that made me look like a square, and learned to embrace that I was skinny. And then I notice it in my friends, too, like Sammy wears too much black, it doesn’t work with her hair colour, and you show a bit more skin than you should, being a nice girl and all, and Deedee would look so nice if she started wearing high waisted skirts. I love those sections in magazines that help you dress to your type, and explain why and how and everything…

2. Diss yourself in the process!
Ex.: Your boyfriend is ugly. —–> I have such bad taste in men, it sucks! I just don’t find your boyfriend attractive at all, and it worries me!

1. Turn it into a compliment!
Ex.: You should go to the gym more. —> You have such a nice figure, you should start taking some fitness classes to maintain that bod as long as possible!